Dead inside.

Literally. Today I got to see a few cases of iud and it is also a day when d prof said and I quote 'u are stone hearted' to which I was super speechless and just kept laughing it off cos he's so ridiculously funny. Or funnily ridiculous. Both. Lol.

Anws. Its nothing Near funny to know that a fetus (some as close as making it to 37weeks) to be lifeless, floating about in his safe bubble of amniotic fluid. Heartbeatless. Waiting to be expelled. Only to be so eerily quiet and still. Not to mention the heartbroken faces on the mothers. Its just so sad.

Space

I still wonder, how everyone seems to know their paths, and What they really want.

They say, do What you enjoy most.

And here I am and all I want is to love u and be with you bcos that's What I know best.

Many times I am swallowed by fear and anxiety that all I want to do is keep safe in this sanctuary. But that would be really timid of me. Not to mention unrealistic.

They also say, nothing is easy. And that things are difficult bcos they are worth it.

I almost forgot I have this space for all these timea of calamity. My heart is still searching, not knowing ehat it is that I'm even looking for.